I’m a hipster

Over the weekend we went to South Beach and ate at a trendy spot for lunch. There was a group of eight women sitting next to us in their cute little dresses and short shorts, hair perfectly coifed and just the right amount of makeup for a lazy Sunday afternoon.

Here I was wearing black skinny jeans that had already been worn twice but, didn’t smell bad, yet. Unfortunately, it had a small stain from where the baby touched me with her hands while she was eating Pirates Booty, which I saw AFTER we left the house. Of course.

I wore boots because I haven’t had the time for a pedicure and the nail polish chips are brutal.

My hair hadn’t been washed in two days and was frizzy as fuck (hmmm… a good book title?). It was pulled into a grotesque ponytail that looked like I had done it with my feet.

I didn’t bother with any makeup that day because honesty, I really thought we were just going to go to the local pizza shop down the street (damn you, Carl, for being spontaneous). Also, I was too lazy.

So all in all, I was looking fan-tastic.

I was conflicted. For a second, I mourned my former single self, the one that was carefree and fearless. The one that was obsessed with high end designer clothing from Neiman Marcus and Barney’s. The one that used to look cute in anything and fit into anything without having to suck in my gut.

But then I smiled and laughed, realizing just how far I’d drifted from said former self. Sometimes I leave the house without brushing my teeth. I forget to put deodorant on. I drive a minivan. I yell at the kids the same things my mom used to yell at me. I leave the house, sometimes, in the tank top I slept in. I eat food off the kids’ plates. My idea of exercise is walking upstairs to take a nap.

I have three awesome kids that I would give my life for. I have a husband that loves me unconditionally, despite my many flaws. I have a dog that melts my heart with his big puppy eyes.

So yeah – my life now? It’s awesome. I wouldn’t change a thing.

Also, Carl had the bright idea of going to the beach after lunch. So I went to the beach. In boots. Because that’s what you do when you’re carefree and fearless.

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