I’m moving to a nudist colony

Even my clothes fucking insult me and put me in a bad mood. My robe doesn’t hate on me, though. It understands that we all come in different sizes and welcomes me every day, calling to me with its chant: one size fits all.

MONDAY!

You may have noticed (probably not because you need some glasses like Carl who’s practically blind, but more about that later this week, if I can remember), that things are a-changin’ here, mainly up above. No, not there. Here. In the nav bar. See? Yes, there.

I moved the link for Rhana and Sean’s Excellent Adventure under Goodies because well, Sean got a paying writing gig and now he’s too busy to chat stupid with me. Whatevs. At least I still have the wall to talk to.

And then there’s the new The Shop! button. Ta-Da! There’s nothing there right now except white space and if you want to buy space then I’m happy to charge you and yes, I accept credit cards.

Anyway, we’re experimenting here and by we I mean me and by experimenting I mean what the duck am I doing?

Years ago, Carl and I had this little online mom and pop shop called Funky Green Machine and I loved it so. But then I got pregnant with the toddler and the twix hit the fan and Funky Green Machine and I had to say goodbye. Goddamit! Where are my tissues?

So I thought I’d put up a little shop here and see how that goes. You’ll start seeing a few things in The Shop! in the next month or so. Things I dig, things I think you should dig, things that will change your life for the better! Maybe. I don’t know. Wait – am I practicing false advertising here? Shit, I haven’t even started yet and I’m fucking things up already.

Did you guys see that my Seahawks won the fucking Super Bowl last night. They didn’t just win, they dominated, sort of like how I dominate Carl when I force him to play Scrabble with me, which was only one time and then he refused to play with me. He said letters made me mean.

The moral of today’s story is: You lose focus when you have kids (and when you’re hungry) and clothes lie. They fucking lie!

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